​​The Most Common Reasons People Quit Therapy

There are many reasons why people might choose to quit therapy. In this post, we’ll explore some of the most common reasons people stop therapy.

• The therapist is not a good fit for you

  It generally takes a few sessions with a therapist to get a good sense if they are a good match for you or not. Generally, we suggest at least going to counselling for 3-4 sessions to get an accurate read. If you feel as though you are not connecting with this therapist, meaning you are not feeling comfortable with them, they are not understanding your hopes and goals for counselling, or that their skill level is not able to support you in the way you need, you may decide that finding another therapist is a good choice. If you feel comfortable, most counsellors will welcome this conversation!

  If a counsellor can hear your concerns, they can possibly change their therapeutic approach to possibly meet your goals for counselling more effectively, and in a way that aligns better for you. However, it is important to trust your instincts. At the end of the day, good work will only happen in the therapeutic space if we feel comfortable and safe. Rapport with your therapist is one of the most important therapeutic factors. Sometimes it just takes a little trial and error to find the right fit. So don’t be discouraged—keep looking until you find someone with whom you feel comfortable sharing your innermost thoughts. 

• You don’t feel like you’re making progress

  It’s common to feel like you’re not making progress in therapy. After all, therapy is a process of slowly exploring your thoughts and feelings, and this can feel like a slow change. It is also common to feel as though things are getting worse before they get better! This is because we are disrupting patterns in our life. Anytime we create some change, there is some discomfort to this. This is not a bad thing. This is actually likely a sign of growth! Make therapy a priority by showing up for your scheduled sessions. Keep a journal to track your thoughts and feelings. This can be a valuable way to see how far you’ve come, and it can help you identify any patterns or areas that need further exploration. Finally, talk to your therapist about your concerns. They can offer guidance and reassurance about the progress you’re making. Remember, therapy is a journey, not a race, so trust the process and be patient with yourself.

• You are uncomfortable discussing personal issues with a stranger

  Many people feel uncomfortable discussing personal issues with a stranger. After all, therapy requires that you open up about some of the most private aspects of your life and this can feel like a very vulnerable process.  The thought of sharing your deepest fears and insecurities with someone you don’t know can be daunting. For some people, the discomfort is so great that they quit therapy altogether. While it is understandable to feel uneasy about disclosing personal information, it is important to remember that your therapist is bound by confidentiality. This means that anything you say will be kept confidential unless you give written permission for it to be shared (example: for your therapist to talk to your doctor for continuity of care).

  Counselling should be challenging, but not so uncomfortable that you never want to come back. If you are feeling too uncomfortable, this may be a sign that the therapeutic relationship and content of what you are discussing is too much too soon and you need to enter this at a slower pace. This is valuable information to share with your counsellor so they can support you in your self disclosure as a more safe and comfortable pace for you.

• The therapist is judgmental or dismissive

  It is important to feel safe and respected when attending therapy. Unfortunately, there are times when therapists may be dealing with their own burn out and come across as judgmental or dismissive, causing people to feel misunderstood or unsupported. If you ever find yourself in this situation, you may feel safer working with someone else. It is perfectly okay for you to seek support from someone else! You are not bound to continue working with that therapist and have every right to connect with someone new. 

• You don’t have enough time in your schedule to attend regular sessions

  While therapy can be an immensely valuable tool, it is not always possible to attend regular sessions. Life can be unpredictable and hectic, and there may be periods of time when it is simply not possible to fit therapy into your schedule. However, this doesn’t mean that you have to forego treatment altogether. There are a number of ways to receive therapy without attending regular sessions. One option is to seek out a therapist who offers online or telephone counselling. These services can be flexible and convenient, making it easier to fit therapy into your busy life. Frequency of therapy sessions are also based on your goals for counselling. Some clients come once every 6 weeks as a check in basis, some once every 4 weeks, and others once every week to two or three weeks. It is all dependant on you and what is feasible and realistic with your schedule. 

If you’re feeling like therapy isn’t working for you, don’t give up just yet. There may be other reasons why it hasn’t been effective, and we want to help you find the right solution for your needs. Please reach out to us so we can talk about what might be holding you back and look at some alternative options, such as online therapy. With the right support, you can achieve your goals in therapy and feel better.

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